Wedding Rings

I certainly know what I would want to buy as our wedding bands, if I weren't already planning on making them myself.

Erica Weiner Jewelry is amazing.

I have long had a love of Erica Weiner jewelry. I love her castings of old rings, and these two are no exception. The larger of the two has "Gift" inscribed in Old Slavic, which is a dead language but a linguistic precursor to both Slovak and Slovenian (which is cool because I am Slovenian and my fiance is Slovak). The smaller ring has "Remembrance" inscribed with open work.

Erica Weiner re-cast them in 14k yellow gold and sells them as a set. I love them, but sort of wish they were available in other metals (white gold and sterling silver, specifically). She has brass versions available that can be strung on chain as a necklace, but I would want to wear them as rings and the brass would definitely make my finger green.

However, I had decided long before I saw these rings that I was going to be making our wedding bands. The plan is to make John a simple sterling silver band (He said white gold still looked sort of yellow to him in comparison, which is true).

I am actually making two rings for myself, one to sit on either side of my engagement ring. My perfect ring looks like this:

Sigh. Love. Both those photos are from the original Etsy listing, by the way; the ring was made by the amazingly talented Kate Szabone, and the photos are hers as well.

Anyways, my plan is to make two simple 14k white gold bands, both in the same grooved pattern as my ring. The bands will wrap perfectly around the diamond so it looks like it was made to be a set. I read in my wedding research (yes, I am a nerd and researched how wedding traditions came about) that in Scandinavian countries women will sometimes wear three rings: one to represent the engagement, one to represent the marriage vows, and one to represent motherhood and your future family. I like the sentiment of that, plus I don't think I could deal with asymmetry on my finger. I need a ring on each side to balance things out!

The choice to make the rings wasn't one based solely on saving money, or by my status as a fiercely-DIY sort of bride (though both are valid reasons). The main reason I decided to make our wedding bands is to pay tribute to my maternal grandmother, who was a watercolor painter and silversmith. My grandmother made my parents' wedding rings, as well as several pieces for my aunts and mom over the years. I inherited all of her jewelry tools and supplies, including some of her original silver.

Rings made by my grandmother and I.

I think it's so amazing that I barely knew her growing up, and yet I ended up years later pursuing something she loved to do. I think I must get some artistic talent from her (and my mother), because I have always loved working with my hands to create things. Making our wedding bands will be such an exciting manifestation of that passion.

I hope someday I learn more about metalsmithing (particularly stone setting and lost-wax casting) and can set up a small workshop to practice the craft. It will be such a lovely way to feel connected to her and to my artistic roots.

On an unrelated note, I found an interesting source (possibly apocryphal, but cool nonetheless) that talked about why the ring finger represents your marriage.

Apparently, the thumb represents your parents, the index finger represents your siblings, the middle finger represents yourself, the ring finger represents your partner, and the pinky your children. Hold your hands so that your fingers are tip to tip, then lower the middle fingers down into the space between your hands. You can easily separate any pair of fingers (thumbs, indexes)-except for the ring finger. This represents that you will not live with your parents forever, nor your siblings. Your children will eventually grow up an move out. But your partner and you are joined for life (interdependency for the win?).

Now, before the med school kids get on my case about anatomy, I know from back in my piano-playing days that the ring fingers can't separate for a different reason: they are the weakest fingers because they only have one extensor tendon while all the other fingers have two. Boo-ya. Aren't you proud of my knowledge of the anatomy of the hand? I am*.

*My former violin teacher used to explain everything wrong with my technique using anatomy. She would discuss specific joints, tendons, and muscles used to create different bow strokes. I guess some of it stuck!