Garter

John and I decided the garter toss tradition was creepy. We've seen it at so many weddings, so we don't knock you if you do it, but we just thought it felt a little weird to have him crawling up my leg under my skirts with all those family members at our wedding. Plus, I didn't have a spare bouquet to toss, and I certainly wasn't going to get rid of mine, which was everything I dreamed of and more.

Thus, in my heart I knew the garter wasn't really an important detail in the grand scheme of things. It wasn't going to be an old, new, borrowed or blue. But then I stumbled across Florrie Mitton's garters on etsy:

Perfection.

It's girlier than I would normally go, but there was something about the fluffiness of it, and that amazing applique, the glittery tulle. But it was way out of my price range ($92), so that seemed to settle it. It sat in my favorites and I would look at it longingly from time to time.

Then, a month or so after I discovered the garter, I discovered this listing in one of my favorite millinery suppliers. So I ordered it, cut it apart into individual appliques, removed the cheap sequins and pearls, and tea-dyed them (it sounds really labor intensive, but it wasn't that bad).

Dana: That looks just like the applique on that garter!
Hmm...

De-sequined, ready to be tea-stained.
Did this while watching The Social Network with John.

Yes, that may or may not be Harney & Sons Wedding Tea
in that tin. I'm so cute.

I left the appliques in for about 40 minutes. I guessed
as I went along, checked for color every now and then,
and removed them when they looked slightly darker
than I wanted them to be (since they dry lighter).

Also tea-dyed some lace leaves while I was at it, which
I use in my hairclips/fascinators. It smelled amazing as it dried.
I like that they're dyed in wedding tea, even though nobody
would know that detail without my telling them.

Wedding Tea is basically Vanilla/Rosebuds/Lemon, in a
white tea (of course). It was one of my favorites long
before being engaged.

After that I did some searching for nude colored glitter-tulle, and found one in a color called sand. From there, it was simply a matter of beading the appliques with 3 and 4mm swarovski bicone beads in silk (which I had lying around from other jewelry projects), and champagne seed beads in the leaves. This was the tedious part; I only completely beaded a handful of pieces before getting caught up in other projects. I may finish the rest and turn them into necklaces, like this one:

A finished applique. This one became a lace necklace a la White Owl.

So much better with the tea stain and the different beading. The
original trim looks so cheap in comparison.

I'm actually wearing this necklace as I write this entry! :)

From there, I asked John's mom to help me by sewing it all together. She has a sewing machine, so she gathered the tulle on elastic so it would fit around my leg. I basted the applique on it and I think it turned out great!

My one regret is that I added a bit of watercolor to the original applique, which wasn't diluted enough to get the gently muted effect of the original. It turned out too green and wasn't as subtle as I had hoped. I considered carefully taking a seam-ripper and removing the original and replacing it with one of the regular, un-painted versions, but I loved it just the same. I can't wait to see pictures of me getting ready, pulling the garter on and the like. Should make for some nice photos.

The garter added a fun layer of tradition to my day to have it, even if it wasn't my something-anything. I recommend having it, even if you're a non-traditional bride. As with many things pertaining to weddings, when do you ever get to do this again? How often do you wear garters in real life? Or big white dresses? Or veils?

In lieu of a ring bearer pillow...

Yes, I cut a hole into a vintage book. It wasn't the most kind I've ever been. But, to be fair, I tried to read the book first, and it was dry as dust. I kid you not. With a title like "Their Wedding Journey" I expected a sweet romance that ends with a wedding. 

Nope. It's a story about some boring Victorian couple who take their honeymoon way after their wedding. Also the bride is slightly older than most brides (which in those days probably meant she was like 22 or something). The honeymoon is pretty much to Niagara Falls. The book wastes time on pedantic descriptions of the travel conditions and awful, awful dialogue.

I say this to justify myself, but really, I don't feel that bad. If the book had been more interesting I would have kept it as is and displayed it on a table or something.

But the hole in the book didn't look like much until I added a small ring box and teal ribbon (not to mention the rings!). The ribbon was courtesy of my maid of honor, who had brought it to tie treat bags at the bachelorette party, because yes, she made party favors for my bachelorette party. She is so classy and southern and I love her to death. The ribbon looks green in the photos, but I took the photos at night, so that's probably why. Blame it on lightbulbs+no ambient light+my camera skills.

Why did I even bother, you ask? I mean, I could have handed Andy the rings in a regular little ring box, he could have kept them in a pocket, and not have a huge book to carry around. Well, the answer is ring-warming.

Alex, one of the groomsmen thought I said "ring-worming" when I first told him about it. Not quite the same. This is the point in the wedding ceremony planning where couples decide they need to add another layer of meaning and ritual, and basically make up their own. Some of these ideas catch on and are used in many weddings.

I've seen couples planting trees using the soil from their childhood homes (so cute). I've seen unity candles, where your mothers light a candle representing your family and you take those candles and light a larger candle representing your new family (I've also seen brides and grooms then proceed to blow out their family candles, which bugs me every time because I don't like the symbolism there). I've seen sand ceremonies where it looks a little like sand art you do at summer camp and then you display this random hurricane vase full of sand in your wedding colors on your mantel in your new home (not as cute, but practical for a beach wedding I suppose).

But I found one that I really thought would fit John and I. A ring warming is where you actually pass the rings through your guests. The idea is that they will hold the rings for a moment, think of a wish or prayer for the couple, and pass them on. By the time the rings come back, they are then stronger and more precious since they contain the love and support of your friends and family.

What I like about this ceremony is how it recognizes everybody: not simply your mom and dad or your immediate families. I know that my relationship with John is the result of a lot of conversations with friends (especially before we were together when they were all trying to convince me that John was madly in love with me and I should pursue it). They say it takes a village to raise a child, but I also think  it takes a community of family and friends supporting your marriage for it to truly succeed.

Thus, we had a ring warming. I could have placed the rings on a pillow (and I had ideas to cover one with vintage handkerchiefs or scraps of my grandmother's lace), but it seemed so strange to me to have a pillow when we didn't have any small children to act as the ring bearer. Andy with a frilly little pillow? Funny, but not quite right.

This was one of my favorite details from the wedding. Our officiant explained how I had made the wedding bands as a tribute to my grandmother, so the ring warming took on an extra significance as the guests examined my handiwork and gave us their blessings.

At first I wondered if this was going to be cheesy in practice, but I had so many people at the reception tell me it was a beautiful, meaningful idea and a wonderful way to include the guests in the ceremony. My aunt was in tears thinking of her mom making wedding bands and me carrying on the tradition. I was beaming as I watched the book travel through our families and friends and I really felt that it added something to the exchange of rings to feel all that love and support radiating out from our loved ones.

Brilliant Ideas for Photos

Reasons I love this idea:
1) It looks amazing as a backdrop.
2) We have a ton of loose sheet music left over from making paper flowers.
3) John and I are musicians so this would be a fun way to tie that in. :)

Spotted on Hi-Fi Weddings, Photography by Amanda Doublin. What a brilliant idea!

Awesome Cake

It's been a while since a cake caught my eye, but this one was just striking:

On EatCakeBeMerry

Gorgeous!

Vintage Book Page Decoration

I recently saw two fabulous photos where brides made use of vintage book pages in their decor, to stunning results.

Seen on Green Wedding Shoes, photos by Focus Photography 

Seen on Love and Lavender, photography by Jason and Anna Photography

The second version is a lot easier to pull off, but both are so beautiful!

Ruffled DIY Strikes Again!

Ruffled always has such amazing DIY tutorials. My most recent favorite involves pretty paper wheels that mimic the look of those seen at BHLDN.

Pretty, but not something I can afford to pay $34 for

The best part of Ruffled's version? Totally customizable with your
wedding colors!

I've made a couple, and they've turned out really cute. I'd take pictures, but I'm too busy crafting. I promise I will document all my recent crafting successes. With only a few weeks to go, things are busy around here!

However, I'm having fun. At this point, everything adds some beauty and personalization but nothing is absolutely necessary. We have food, venues, an amazing photographer (Ken Clunk; he's the bestest), places to sleep, and a bunch of excited friends and family. It's going to be a frikkin' awesome wedding.

If I can just decide what the heck to walk down the aisle to...it's been the hardest decision I've ever had to make. I'm arranging some music for the quartet, but it's tough to decide what should go where! More on that in another post, I'm sure.

Perfection.

This image sums up a vision of what I want my wedding to feel like:

On Style Me Pretty, photo by
Tyler Metcalfe Photography and Greenleaf Images

I love the woodsy feel, mixed with the vintage photographs in gorgeous old frames.

I am currently rounding up old photos of all our sets of grandparents to display somewhere at the reception (possibly at the table with all the escort cards.

Gorgeous!!!

Adorable Detail

A quick little detail, that made me smile. A couple designs an adorable wedding logo consisting of two raccoons, and has it screenprinted on the inside of the groom's and groomsmen's vests, and engraved into the groom's wedding ring:

Spotted on Green Wedding Shoes, photography by Jodi Miller Photography.

Superhero Themed Wedding

I friggin' love this wedding. I spotted it a few weeks ago, but have been a bad blogger and haven't yet shared it.

I spotted the wedding on Green Wedding Shoes (which I've really been digging lately), with photography by Jagger Photography.

Things I love about this wedding:

1) The clever cereal bar and names for the cereals (Cocoa Kryptonite, Mr. Freeze Frosted Flakes)

2) The wonderfully bright, cheerful colors.

3) All of the backdrops for their photos. Amazing!!!

Amen!

Just go read it, especially if you're a fellow bride. Offbeat Bride writes a wonderful denouncement of the word "tacky"

Brides all over wedding websites worry that their nontraditional wedding will be "tacky." But this term is so meaningless because it's all about context. Just as I know I could never hold a 300 guest soiree in a ballroom downtown with 6 foot tall centerpieces and an all white cake and Canon in D to walk down the aisle...lots of brides do just that. Most of the weddings I play have most of those elements. And you know what? As much as my quartet will occasionally judge (we love silently judging the guests who wear too-short minidresses with spindly little stripper heels), we mostly celebrate what was beautiful: the bride beaming as she walks down the aisle, the groom tearing up during the vows.

I just wish I had given myself a little less grief when I was searching for my wedding dress and getting so upset because I felt like a "bad bride." The wedding industry is sneaky, and very very good at making you feel like you have to do things a certain way. This article is a reminder that nobody is a bad bride. If you want to cosplay at your wedding as elves from the Lord of the Rings, and have your wedding bands engraved with "One ring to rule them all...in holy matrimony," go for it. The people who love you will likely see these ideas as so unmistakably you, and they will love you all the more for expressing yourselves in your wedding planning.

Hand-drawn invite love

The groom hand-drew details from their entire relationship
I love how the response card is tucked in with photo corners!!!

Above the outgoing address, it said "Dear Postman, warmly deliver
this tender parcel to our fine guests." LOVE.

What a fine invitation set! To see the whole wedding, check out the feature on Martha Stewart.

Amazing Dress

Spotted on Ruffled, photography by Chad Cress.

...It's that incredible embroidery at the bottom. So incredibly unique, and absolutely stunning! And I'm somebody who hates pink!

The motif reminds me of vintage handkerchiefs, which I would then totally use in the decor. But then again, I'm Miss Vintage Bride. This bride chose to use flamingoes in the decor. Give it a look here on Ruffled.

Also, who can resist a kiss shot like this one? I love it!

Spotted on Ruffled, photography by Chad Cress.

Invite Suite: RSVP Cards

In deciding to design and print my own invites, I knew it would be a lot of work, but I didn't expect the process I have gone through (the countless hours, and I'm not even done yet!). Case in point: the RSVP cards. Just a simple little card with which to reply and tell us you're coming, right?

Well, you know me. I have about 3 different designs mocked up with multiple fonts. You have to play around to see what works (or, at least, I do, since I'm not a trained graphic designer and I need to see different combinations to know what will look best).

Here is one such version. This was the starting point, a vintage french soap label with the text removed.

Which I then took and made a "backside" which extended the open space for text:

Then I had to settle on RSVP wording. I don't want to simply have a "yes" and "no," so I looked up all sorts of different ways to word the card. Some were overly cutesy ("I'll be there with bells on" and "Can't make it, but heard there will be people wearing bells"), some were silly ("I'll be there come rain or come shine!" "Sorry, out of umbrellas and sunscreen.") and others were stupid (many of them). 

Since the wedding is so vintage themed, I wanted something classic without being boring, and a little elegant. I settled on using "in body" for yes and "in spirit" for no. I like it.

So, then it was time to play with fonts.

...And several versions later, it was getting frustrating. I then decided the images needed something even more visual, so I thought putting a little divider or image between the two sections would help:

They're definitely cute. But the diamond seems a little out of place with the rest of the image. So then I went for background images, which consisted of three steps:

1) Dig up my old letterpress image files from briarpress.org
2) Open them up individually in GIMP (freeware photoshop-type program), add an alpha channel, select all the white in the image, then clear to make a transparent background.
3) Add the transparent image as a new layer to the RSVP card, and edit the opacity of the image to make it lighter and put it behind the text.

The result of all this was that I ended up with two that I liked:

What do you think? I think both are pretty great, it's just tough deciding. Perhaps once the other pieces fall into place, one will look better with the other elements. 

I know it's weird to design such a small part of the paper goods first, but I was just drawn to this image and it screamed RSVP card to me for some reason. I couldn't tell you why. This isn't to say these are the RSVP cards, end of story. By the time the invites are done I might go with something completely different.

Note to all fellow brides: DIY IS HARD. Just so you know. I am undertaking all this because I am stubborn and it's a labor of love, but don't think it isn't insane of me.